Mirror, Mirror

Some years ago I was listening to a woman on the radio who was discussing her book.

She was a Christian woman who believed that as a society we should be teaching self-worth to our children, instead pushing the agenda of self-esteem.

I was interested in her insights, for what she described is an excellent illustration of their differences.

Self-esteem is like looking the the mirror.  One looks in the mirror to see himself or herself.  Very rarely is the person looking in the mirror concerned about what happens around them.  And for many, a mirror may never seem big enough.

Self-worth, on the other hand, is like looking through a glass window.  One looks through a window to see what is on the other side.  But the beauty of glass is that many times, when the light is right, one can see their own reflection.

Thus, self-esteem is all about me.  Self-worth is about how and who I am with everything around me.

Which brings me to what I found ironic and juxtaposed. (Does that even make any sense)?

I was flipping through the weekly ads that come through the mail and found an ad for THIS.  The 3rd Annual Dove Self-Esteem Weekend.

Which, so very ironically, is the SAME weekend as General Conference.

And I am quite sure one will offer self-esteem. Complete with a mirror hanging on the wall.

The other, however, will quietly, yet powerfully remind me of who I really am.

That I am just one spiritual generation away as a daughter of God.

And if I'm quiet enough, that glass window of self-worth will remind me whose image I need engraven on my countenance.

A Toast, for all it's Worth!

Last week it smelled as if our fridge was going out.

Like something was burning.

Except the burning smelled like really, really bad burnt toast.

So I was confused, because the refrigerator wasn't making odd sounds or sputtering for dear life.

But when I went to adjust the temperature control just a notch to the right, everything shut down.

Like in the movies of the 1970's when the bad guy pulls down the lever to the computer that is housed in a 44800 sq. foot warehouse and everything goes out - sound effects and all?

And that's when I knew we were in for it.

Buying a fridge isn't pocket change.

So my husband came and fiddled while I changed the temperature control some more.  And I consigned myself that by the next morning we would be shopping for a new fridge and I'd be on a MAJOR grocery run.

But before I went to bed, I did place a large cup of baking soda in the fridge.

To absorb the odors, you know.

Because darn it, if my fridge goes out, I don't want it smelling bad!

And the next day, to my GREAT surprise, the fridge was still running,  . . .and still smelling like burnt toast.  Really, really bad burnt toast.  (I know, I said it before, but it was realy, really, really bad!!)

It wasn't until after school when my hungry 15 year old went to make himself a Sloppy Joe. And he had to p.e.e.l. away the hamburger buns away from the light bulb in the very back of the fridge.

Not only had the plastic melted . . .

 . . . But the buns had been toasted.

My son had solved the mystery.

Good news is, we still have a working fridge that DOESN'T smell like really, really, really bad burnt toast.

It smells like bad beans.

Because some forgot to throw away last month's leftovers.

And bad burnt toast smells a whole heck of a lot better that bad beans.

Surprise

Not too long ago I was able to listen to Sister Elaine. S. Dalton speak - in person!

Is she not beautifully amazing and amazingly beautiful?!?

She said something to the young women she was addressing that in no way, shape or form applied to blogging whatsoever. But I've been thinking about what she said as it applies to my little world within the blogosphere.

She said something like this:

When you start feeling like you're fitting in, you will be unable to lead. The Lord needs leaders, not people who want to fit in.

And that is where I have been for the past  three and a half months - trying to figure out why I want to fit-in with mommy bloggers who create, and share, and craft, and photograph, and have legions of followers who Tweet and Facebook and the what nots - all at the SAME TIME!!!

Because comparatively speaking, I have little to offer. So very little.  For it seems undaunting to just be who I am, and share what I feel when I'm feeling that I don't fit in.

But after hearing Sis. Dalton, and being asked by a few people if I was ever going to blog again, it made me realize that no matter how small and simple my offering, it's okay NOT to fit in!!

So I won't!

And I think I'll start blogging again.

Because frankly, I've got an awful lot to share!