Ah, the Smart Phone!

Today three of my high school boys had a basketball conditioning practice dealio after school. I still had some errands to do, so I took the remainder of my tribe to Costco for gasoline AND to score on the free samples.

Just as I was at the checkout (cashing out our week's savings on necessities of chocolate chips, brownie mix and almonds), my phone started ringing. I didn't recognize the number that called (twice!) so I sent it to voice mail with a text message . . .

Here's the entire text conversation:

Me: I can't talk now, but I can text :)

Me: I can't talk now, but I can text :)

Texter: Who is this?

Me: Didn't you call me?

Texter: Nope

Me: Did you call for an inspection? Leave a VM?

I schedule home inspections for my husband and had noticed a voice mail had been left after the call was made.  I checked my recent calls. I hadn't called the number - the number had called me!  I was dumbfounded!

Texter: Sons

Ah, that's when I realized that my boys were texting me from someone else's phone to let me know they were finished with their practice. And then this expressive text came  -

Texter: I think your sins might have called you

Wow! Major smartphone typo, and yet a lesson in disguise. I responded

Me: You are right . . .My sins are always calling me to repentance :) thx!

Texter: Yeah, . . . they just finished conditioning. Your welcome :) (sic)

I don't think my sons' friend even knew the lesson his smart phone taught me

The Widow's Mites

For me, the story of the widow’s mites contrasts starkly against the story of Ananias and Sapphirra. Each tells a story of giving an offering to the Lord. Each, in turn, tell of its consequences.

The widow, under the glare of wealthy Pharisees, cast into the treasury the only worldly wealth she possessed. It was a small offering. It was her whole offering. The widow gave everything she had the Lord. On that day, she walked away from the temple as a witness that God rewards those who render to Him all that they have and are.

Meanwhile, Ananais and Sapphira received payment for something they had sold. No one knew how much they chose to held back. They easily could have held back as little as two mites. Nonetheless, when they laid their offering at Peter’s feet, he immediately recognized a whole offering had not been made. Holding back, even the smallest part, not only kept Ananais and Sapphira from standing as a witness of God, it kept them from ever. standing. again.

I find it interesting that we aren’t told the age of the widow. We aren’t told if the widow had children or grandchildren. But over the years, for me, the age of the widow has decreased from an aged, slumped over ninety year old to a mother in her late thirties with small children to feed. A widow young enough to be persuaded to keep at least one of the two mites . . . for her children’s sake.

Her willingness to give “all her living,” not only did God witness that her heart was all His, she testified to her children in Whom to look in order to live.

I’d like to think this widow’s specific act blessed her and her posterity one hundredfold beyond measure. Her one recorded act has certainly has blessed me!

The widow's mites has taught me that my giving must come from a giver’s heart. And that my giver’s heart must be filled with gratitude for God.

Some years ago, my husband and I were literally down to our last $59 dollars. My husband was self-employed. We were expecting child number eight. We had a house payment and a van payment and everything else that comes with home ownership and raising children. While I didn’t know it then, we had a choice to be like the widow or Ananias and Sapphira.

I learned that in circumstances so dim, it’s not easy to be like the widow. We live in a world that sympathizes with those who hold back a part. It would have been easier to justify giving part or half or none. But we choose to offer all. Even when our offering was so insignificantly small. 

What I felt during those struggling years, as we gave in our want, was a joy beyond anything I can describe – a sweet, sacred joy that has surpassed any giving I have done when I have had in abundance.

I hope to someday stand before the poor widow who gave her two mites and thank her for her act of faith which has blessed my living beyond measure.

Becoming as a Little Child

It is late.

So late that it's early. . .

I can hear three of my teenage boys laughing and talking in the kitchen as they make (and eat) pudding after midnight. (I know!! It's the last Friday before school begins again.) Which means, my three year old will be up at the crack of dawn. No rest for the wicked.

This morning for family scriptures we read and discussed THIS part in the New Testament.

Disciple's Question: Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?

Jesus' Answer: Be converted and become as little children.

This is a two-part answer! Which brings me to a very important question. How do conversion and becoming as a little child work together?

David A. Bedar says it beautifully: "The essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ entails a fundamental and permanent change in our very nature made possible through the Savior’s Atonement. True conversion brings a change in one’s beliefs, heart, and life to accept and conform to the will of God and includes a conscious commitment to become a disciple of Christ.

"Conversion is an enlarging, a deepening, and a broadening of the undergirding base of testimony. It is the result of revelation from God, accompanied by individual repentance, obedience, and diligence. Any honest seeker of truth can become converted by experiencing the mighty change of heart and being spiritually born of God. As we honor the ordinances and covenants of salvation and exaltation, 'press forward with a steadfastness in Christ', and endure in faith to the end, we become new creatures in Christ. Conversion is an offering of self, of love, and of loyalty we give to God in gratitude for the gift of testimony."

As I consider the wonder that comes about through true conversion, the desirable characteristics of a little child naturally follow: submissiveness, meekness, humility, patience, love, and a willingness to obey the Father.

But, I will be honest. I am far (far, away on Judea's Plains) from true conversion, because I have major difficulty being submissive, meek, humble, patient and/or loving most of the time! Believe me when I say that I am more child-ish than child-like. And it doesn't feel so good, because, in my willing desire to obey the Father, He let's me know. (Boy, does He ever)!

I am learning that becoming is a process. I cannot become converted or become like a little child without Him.

Line upon line.

Lesson upon lesson.

Failure upon failure.

"Be of good cheer," He encourages, "I will lead you along."

Walking on the Sea

Following the Savior’s miraculous feeding of the five thousand with five loaves and two fishes, He compels His disciples to go into their ship as He personally sees to it that the multitude disperses.

These two simple acts help me better understand Jesus’s love.

Concerned for the weariness of His disciples, He sends His “children” bed, and continuing His outpouring of compassion - healing and feeding the multitude - Jesus personally sends them home.

Finally, with a night of solitude ahead, Jesus goes up into a mountain to pray.

However, the night wasn’t calm and peaceful for those He had sent to bed. For most of the night, the sea tossed and turned. And the disciples struggled “at their oars,” as the winds were contrary to everything they could offer.

For hours the disciples toiled. Not exactly the night of solitude as the Savior had on the mountain.
And sometime around 3:00 – 6:00 in the morning, during the “fourth watch,” the fatigued disciples see Something walking on the roiling waves.Walking. Not stumbling. Not struggling. Not faltering. But, walking on the water.

Needless to say, the disciples were terrified.

Was it a ghost? A spirit? Or maybe, because of the long night, they were all hallucinating together!

And then they heard His voice.

Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.

To which Peter answered, “Lord, if it be Thou, bid me come unto Thee on the water.”

I want to stop right there for just a moment. I find it significant that at that moment – after four or six or nine hours of being tossed by the sea - Peter does not say, “Lord, if it be Thou, stop the storm!” Instead, Peter asks to walk on the untamed water with Him.

And with one word, Peter’s desire is granted.

And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water to go to Jesus.

Up until this week, I have always thought Peter to be the only person to have ever walked on water.

But I don’t think that is so true anymore.

For just a few, unwavering moments, Peter no longer cared how fierce the storm was. No longer did he care how tired and scared he had been. No, for a few moments, Peter knew, with certainty, that if he would fix His eye on the Savior, he would be filled with whatever he needed to walk on water.

I am learning that this is true. An eye single to His glory fills us with light when there is darkness. An eye single to His glory fills us with faith when there is doubt. An eye single to His glory fills us with understanding when there is confusion.

Along that same time, I think it's equally important to remember that the story of Peter also illustrates to those who “Come” and those who walk, they will inevitably begin sink. I think it’s part of the law of gravity and certainly the law of being natural creatures.

Truth is, I sink more than I have felt the desire to walk on water. But the beautiful part of this story is that immediately, after Peter cried out, Jesus stretched forth His hand to catch him.

I know He does the same for me.

Afraid, I ask.

He beckons, I walk.

I fall, He stretches.

Thoughts about the Beatitudes

Blessedness: a well-spring of real joy, flowing from the inside out 

vs. 

Fortunate: lucky, lucky, lucky me.

Which got me thinking, if the Sermon on the Mount read something more like this: 

Fortunate are the Poor in Spirit or Fortunate are the Peacemakers or Fortunate are They who are Persecuted . . . I have a pretty good feeling I wouldn't feel very fortunate at all.

I would just be terribly, terribly unlucky.

* * * 

The Beatitudes and My Baptismal Covenant

I'm discovering that the Beatitudes are not just a well-known list of blessings promised by the Savior. They are also a powerful reminder of my baptismal covenants.

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

For all my life I have thought “the kingdom of heaven” is the place where I hope to go one day. You know, back to heaven, after I die.

And then, this week, I realized that the definition of the, "kingdom of heaven” is the code word for “The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.” And the purpose of the Church is to prepare its members to live forever in the celestial kingdom or kingdom of heaven. Even the scriptures sometimes call the Church the "kingdom of heaven," meaning that the Church is the kingdom of heaven on earth.

And today, I understand more clearly why we are commanded to meet to together oft. Because when I come to ready to partake the sacrament with a poor spirit, coupled with a broken heart, I can be, for a short moment each week, a part of the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

The scriptures are replete with examples of those who mourned. In fact, current events are headlined with the mourning of the sick, the sad, the dying, the lost. And I am learning that the dawning of each new day brings mourning.

The word mourn comes from an Old English word murnan, meaning ""to mourn, bemoan, long after." But even older than Old English, it comes from the PIE root *(s)mer - "to remember." 

Mourning, then, is not only a way to grieve, it is a way to remember. Perhaps a powerful way to remember our covenants. Because mourning is something we covenanted to do when we were baptized. We covenanted to be willing to mourn with those who mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort.

Thirteen years ago, the day before Mother's Day, the 2 year old son of a dear friend of mine was killed in a tractor accident. The next day she had the lesson in Relief Society. And much to the surprise of all of us, she showed up and gave her lesson.

I remember she had us all stand in a circle, holding hands. I don't remember what she said, but I remember how I felt as we wept and mourned together. And because of that one Mother's Day Mourning, there is not a Mother's Day that goes by that I don't remember my dear friend, her son and God's great plan of happiness.

There is comfort knowing that families can be together forever.

Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

I’m going to be honest, I don't have a pure heart. As much as I try,  most of the time it is filled with its share of impurities.

I am learning that I cannot purify my heart all by myself. A pure heart requires receiving God’s pure love. And understanding how to receive His pure love into my impure heart began the day I was baptized.

First of all, God’s love is not envious, puffed up, or easily provoked. His love thinks no evil and rejoices not in iniquity.

In addition, God's love suffers long. It is kind. It rejoices in truth. It bears and hopes and endures all things.

And most importantly, God's love never fails.

Not ever.

Once we are baptized, the gate back to the kingdom of heaven (the actual place we can go when we die) is opened. And on that path, we are to "press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men" (2 Nephi 31:20).

Which brings me back to why I need to be poor in Spirit, why I need to mourn with those who mourn, and why I must pray to be filled with His love - those actions are part of the covenant I have made.

And His blessing comes when He bestowed His pure love on me - purifying me - even as He is pure, so that when He shall appear, I could be like Him and see Him like He is . . .

and sit down with Him forever, in the kingdom of heaven (Moroni 7:48).

Principles of Prayer found in John 2:1-11

For me, Jesus’ first miracle of turning water into wine, is a lesson about prayer.

Principle #1 - Prayer is how we communicate with God.

John 2:2 – “Jesus was called . . . to the marriage”

In learning how and why I pray, I have come to recognize Who I need to call when I communicate with Deity. As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we understand that it is a commandment to pray to the Father in the name of Christ (3 Nephi 18:19). I am learning that the more my relationship with my Heavenly Father deepens, the more comfortable I am in calling on Him in times of joy as well as in times of sorrow. I know that He knows me and awaits to answer my prayers.

Principle #2 – Prayer is how we petition the Father for our righteous desires.

John 2:3 – “they wanted wine”

I'll admit that there have been times that I have felt guilty for wanting something that was good and right. Or I have had real problems, too big for me to comprehend, and yet, compared to my neighbor or family member, seems so petty in comparison. How can I ask God, who has given me so much anyway, for anything more? Do I have a right? Do my righteous petitions make me sound like I am entitled to those blessings? 

Boyd K. Packer teaches,

“On occasions I’ve had to counsel people for whom the Lord would probably quite willingly approve the thing they intend and want to do. It’s strange that they would come and almost feel guilty about doing something because they want to, even when it’s righteous. The Lord is very generous with the freedom He gives us. The more we learn to follow the right, the more we are spiritually self-reliant, the more our freedom and our independence are affirmed” (Teach Ye Diligently, p. 246).

On the other hand, the absence of petitioning our righteous desires makes us out to be unwise and foolish stewards. We must ask, we must desire to be able to receive.

Neal A. Maxwell writes, 

“Desire denotes a real longing or craving. Hence righteous desires are much more than passive preferences or fleeting feelings. . . .Therefore, what we insistently desire, over time, is what we will eventually become and what we will receive in eternity. . . Righteous desires need to be relentless, . . . Therefore, true Christian soldiers are more than weekend warriors. . .The absence of any keen desire—merely being lukewarm—causes a terrible flattening (see Rev. 3:15). . . Brothers and sisters, a loving God will work with us, but the initiating particle of desire which ignites the spark of resolve must be our own” (Ensign, November 1996, 21).

Principle #3 - God will require us to do something in order for Him to answer our prayer

John 2:4 - "Woman, what have I do with (for) thee?"

Our Father is the perfect parent. He gives to us according to our needs, wants and desires. This same question Jesus asked of his mother, (The title "woman:" being much more respectful that we would think of today), He also asked of the three Nephites (3 Nephi 28:4), the brother of Jared (Ether 2:23), and the blind man on the road to Jericho (Luke 18:41). I believe it is a question our Father asks each of us. "What is your solution? What are you willing to do to receive My help? What have you done or what will you do to "prove me now herewith" to open unto you the windows of heaven?" (Malachi 3:10).

Principle #4 – Receiving personal revelation is how God speaks to us

John 2:5,7 – “Whatsoever He saith unto you, do it . . . and they filled the [the waterpots] up to the brim”

Julie B. Beck said, “The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life.” In other words, when the Lord speaks, listen - and then go and do!

During family scriptures a few weeks ago, I asked my children, “How does the Lord speak to you?” I received nine blank stares. So we sat in silence for a few moments, pondering how the Lord speaks to us. I am learning that recognizing how He speaks (uncomfortable feelings, peace, joy, pure knowledge, etc), requires an obligation on my part. And in fulfilling the obligation He has asked – whether I understand the end result or not – is the way I witness to God that He can trust me do what He asks.

David O. McKay summed it up beautifully, “I want to tell you one thing: When the Lord tells you what to do, you’ve got to have the courage to do it or you had better not ask Him again.”

Principle #5 – God answers prayers

John 2:9 – “the water . . . was made wine”

No, I have not yet seen water turn to wine, but I have seen sorrow transform to joy. I have seen heavy burdens made light. I have seen people I love with all my heart leave their sins behind to come to know Him.  And all this, because I know God answers prayers.

Principle #6 – After prayers of faith, miracles come

John 2:11 – “This beginning of miracles did Jesus . . . and His disciples believed on Him”

I love what President Monson has said, "Does He still hear? Does He continue to answer?” To which I promptly reply: 'There is no expiration date on the Lord’s injunction to pray. As we remember Him, He will remember us.' Most of the time there are no flags waving nor bands playing when prayer is answered. His miracles frequently are performed in a quiet and natural manner."

My testimony is that miracles do happen! For me, the beginning of being able to see miracles happened the day I was born. Since then, I have not ceased to be amazed at how the hand of God works in my life and in the life of my family. 

What the Cleansing of the Temple Has to do with Me

I've been thinking about how the Savior's cleansing of the temple (found in John 2:13-16), has to do with me. I've decided, first and foremost, it is a warning to all parents: "Don't Have Pets!"

But I digress, aside the animals at the temple, I think the Savior was more concerned about what was happening with the animals at the temple. They were being sold for money, for lucre, making the House of the Lord look more like the Great and Spacious Building.

As members of the Church, we are taught that the temple is "a place the Lord may come, it is the most holy of any place of worship on earth." It is a place for retreat, for reflection, for revelation.

But this story of cleansing the temple has more meaningful insight when I am reminded that "only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness." It causes me to question, "Is our little family temple a place where there is holiness to the Lord or are we making it a cozy Babylon Bungalow? Do we allow to be sold out by the things of the world, or are we carefully and diligently laying up treasure in heaven that will last for eternity?

I am reminded that one temple cleanse wasn't enough for the Jews. Just two years later, the Savior had to cleanse it again because the same things were happening. Because Satan never sleeps and life continues to move on, my temple/home will always be in need to cleansing. But I am promised that if I "Organize [myself and]; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house, even a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order," . . .I can attain "a house of God" (D&C 88:119).